Same Issue.

Yesterday my mum told me this " i should get involve and helped out in the household chores and stop living in my own world." My mum got a point. i am living in my own world because i choose to abstain myself from my family matters.

Family matters- going round financial stuff AND taking care of nieces and their stuffs.

phew. i am not even their parents, but i have responsibility for them? that's is why i shut my door at home and thankfully i have my own rooms because i just want to soak up in my own world and do my own things. i will blast my music and drown all frustration and nonsense cries.

is frustrating to me because firstly i am not their parents and i have to take of them, secondly when they cry even i have my door closed i am not that hard hearted and let them go on crying without going out to check on them if they are alright. Thirdly, household chores. My house is like a obstacle course and when it comes to cleaning, i just want to retreat into my room!

my family now is about raising my Sister's kid, getting them feed, clean, school and get to bed on time. All these are the agendas for the everyday life. it take up the whole entire day and it will keep going on in circles This-Is-The-Life-For-Raising-Kids. No Life. Mundane life especially when they are not your kids and you don't have to pledge any commitments to them. You get what i mean?

LOVE

i am feeling good because i finish 1 typography out of 4, and i am happy with my end product. :) though it look nothing like how i sketch, but it does came out like the way i wanted.

sketching it out on paper....

scan it to my computer and do the magic....

How to kill BLUES

I read from somewhere, some time ago on

HOW TO KILL BLUES!

i can't remember the entire list but i do remember a few that i agree with,

tested and proven today and on past occasions.

#1 Sing~!

i sang till my vocal went hoarse. i was singing loud to vent my faustration. okay so i wasn't singing

but it helps to release whatever that i feel moody inside.

i wanted to practice on my guitar but my guitar is badly out of tune and it affected me

so SCREW IT.

#2 Dance dance

yea i just dance in my room, spin twist turn like a Bayblad in my room accordingly to the music

i love. hint* blast yall music!

#3 Look at things that bring back happy memories

i didn't do that today though.

but it believe it helps ;)

 #4 Paint your nails with happy colours!

i was feeling angst when i did my nails.

 i had a base of red, then i decide that

red is the not the colour. i layered another purple coat on top!

purple it is, i was kinda happy after.

if you notice the 3rd finger from the left is not purple is cos,

while i was waiting for the red coat to dry i was trying to lead my life like

usual. like fetching myself a glass of water WITH GREAT CAREFULNESS.

that nail is an evidence that my Carefulness is not enough. 

i didn't bother to  remove it so i moved on with the rest of my nails and coated the rest purple.

End result, i got ugly nails.

whahahhahaa

#5 Cam whore!!!

this method i think is the most effective one to kill blues.

i made so many silly faces and had a good laugh at myself.

#6 Repeat "Live Love Laugh!" proclaiming it and beliving it.

Bittersweet.

Cleared my room and make space enough for me to do cartwheel in my room! booya~

Graduation till now i am idle practically daily except for weekends. My weekend deployment is not longer at Mustafa, boy. i feel happy and reluctant at the same time. Not that i have any good memories left there, rather the liberty i once had. i can go for 2 hours break and take multiple breaks yet still able to hit my daily target.

i wanna move on from my current PT job, i have been saying this since last year November? my basic pay is not bad, but the company is getting real stingy now. they have been cutting back our pay and change our commission scheme that seems so hard to reach. where can you get a basic $8/ hourly and still relatively slack job and most importantly near your house?

Living your dream

Living my dreams is too hard. i need a source of motivation to keep me alive.

i was filling up the application to NAFA and what they offer is really exciting because it includes a 7 week exchange study in UK. i never been too far away from Singapore before so this seems really exciting to me. first, the question is- can i make it through the interview? What If qns next- what if i didn't make it, what is my plan B?

recently i worked for a Property agent events for 2 days and i got to know a little more about how a property agent actually earn. all i can say is the commission they earn from 1 house sold is equivalent to about 4 times my basic pay a fresh Graduate like me would get. attractive? especially at the thought of financial freedom.

i am going to give it a shot and believe in this word FAITH. till then, pray for me. thank you.